Friday, May 26, 2017

#1841: Ken Klein

Ken Klein is an author (America, Globalism and the False Prophet), filmmaker and former NFL defensive back, and apparently not a POE. According to the WND – who is no more trustworthy than spam on these matters – Klein has “stunned viewers” with his DVD Trans-Humanism: Destroying the Barriers. Whatever he claimed in that one (and all evidence suggests that it can’t have been remotely related to anything reasonable), it probably doesn’t begin to compare to his next big report: That “fallen angels exist, are on Earth, and have been filmed …” Indeed. “It’s not a joke,” said Klein, in case anyone thought otherwise: “We have filmed these things in the infrared spectrum, and it’s really real, and it’s really happening on this planet, and it’s getting worse and worse,” he said. “Really real” is a common phrase used to emphasize your conclusions when your evidence is really good.

Apparently these fallen angels are visible in the infrared spectrum, and if you had doubts: “These are those angels that once followed Lucifer, who were deceived, woo’d by him with a great sales pitch, and as a result of that war God decided that he would have to be thrown out of his angelship. And he was thrown into this world, and he’s got billions of followers that are assigned to humanity – some to each human – to monitor each one of us, because each one of us is a potential threat. We shall be called children of God and he hates that because he’s been judged, and he’s not a happy camper.” He didn’t elaborate on the means he used to obtain the backstories of the demons he saw.

Oh, but he’s got more: “Jesus’ physical body had to be tailor-made through the development of generations of specific genes that would pass down to Mary and allow for the Immaculate Conception. It wasn’t just any body that the Spirit of God could dwell in. And so Jesus body came through a very specific line of predecessors. The integrity of His physical DNA was managed through the purity of a specific line of people all the way back to Adam […] I think we can expect the same thing to happen with the body that Lucifer will have to take, because we know that there will be an Antichrist who will be the embodiment of the spirit of Lucifer, who was an archangel. It can’t just be any body; it’s going to have to be an engineered body,” asserted Klein. And you see “Now we have the science to merge all kinds of brilliant scientists and thinkers into a genetic soup that could bring forth a superior intelligence [remember he made a DVD about transhumanism? You probably don’t need to watch it] – and not only that, but a superior body – that could house the spirit of Lucifer.” In other words, technology will unveil “a body that could house the spirit of Satan.” And thus it is that any true believer should beware of science. (At least Lucifer cannot be Obama, so that’s something.)

Klein was also interviewed for Brian Kraft’s The Fall of America and the Western World. His website is here. We are not sure whether he himself classifies the other books and DVDs he sells as fiction or documentaries. These include

- A DVD about the Harlot of Babylon, the identity of which can apparently be revealed by code breaking Revelation 17 (apparently there’s a yuge conspiracy, too).
- “Israel Islam and Armageddon,” a video showing “how the current peace process is fraught with peril, why it is impossible for Jerusalem to know true peace in our age how the Antichrist will lead the world’s armies to destroy Israel, the truth about the Vatican’s intentions, and the Palestinian myth.” Allegedly, the video “powerfully corrects” much of the “misinformation and propaganda” aggressively “advanced by the world media and others.”

He calls his youtube channel “Ken Klein University,” which doesn’t need a comment.

Diagnosis: You can do this one yourself, folks.

Tuesday, May 23, 2017

#1840: Jason Kissner

Jason Kissner is a criminologist and birther who has made his presence well known on various conspiracy websites with his apparently unique take on the birther conspiracy: Kissner claims that Obama is really Indonesian and (of course) a Muslim. In fact, Obama is apparently the son of a cult leader, one Mohammed Subud, since Obama and Sudub, according to conspiracy theorists, look kind of similar in pictures (that they admit to have modified to make the resemblance more obvious to the untrained eye). Kissner has written about these issues for the interestingly named (a corollary of this) website American Thinker; you can find his critical thinking trainwreck about Obama here; it’s rather hilarious.

In addition to his birther stuff, Kissner has made himself known with his Ebola conspiracies – a topic that seems to have generated a whole conspiracy industry back in 2014. According to Kissner, the 2013 outbreak was apparently due to a bioengineered variant of Ebola that is more contagious than previous strains. His evidence is simply an argument from incredulity, based on the fact that Ebola reemerged after being dormant for years and that the Zaire strain that appeared in West Africa is a distinct strain, which Kissner cannot imagine could have happened without human intervention. Kissner is not an epidemiologist. That’s to put things diplomatically. In any case, Kissner concludes that US bioterrorism must have introduced this “new” Ebola strain to Guinea. Why? Well, it has to do with the Ebola drug ZMapp; according to Kissner, the developers of ZMapp must have known about the new strain beforehand. Once again, Kissner is no epidemiologist and really doesn’t appear to have the faintest clue how these things work. More elaborate discussion here. 

Diagnosis: Hilarious nonsense, and one does sometimes suspect he’s a poe. But when you consider what this kind of thinking has managed to lead to by 2017, it does admittedly become a bit less funny.

Sunday, May 21, 2017

#1839: John Kirkwood

Richard King, a central proponent of the the magic melanin theory who, because he viewed melanin as a necessary component of humanity, preferred to use term “hueman” rather than “human” to describe white people, has apparently passed away.

John Kirkwood, however, is still very much a Chicago pastor, (sigh) rabid anti-gay activist and co-host of the radio show Americans For Truth About Homosexuality Radio Hour, which – by extension of Badger’s Law – has nothing to do with truth. (AFTAH is Peter LaBarbera’s group). According to Kirkwood, gays and lesbians are like heroin users, and supporting gay rights is similar to encouraging a drug addict. In an interview with LaBarbera Kirkwood also attacked “the Lady Gaga theology that you were born that way,” pointing out that those who believe such things are “rejecting Kirkwood God” and “disagreeing with him rejecting the Bible.” (Obama, for instance.) Indeed, gay Christians are “satanically inspired,” according to Kirkwood, though for a rabid fundie like Kirkwood “x is satanically inspired” is just a substitute “I don’t fancy x.”

And of course, the gays are bringing America down. In fact, the “homosexual movement” is the “greatest threat to freedom” in the US, as far as Kirkwood is concerned; homosexuality “is a super sin because it reaches far beyond the bounds of what happens between two men or two women in their bedroom, it’s crushing our Constitution and it’s stripping us of our religious freedom, that sounds pretty super to me.” We are not entirely sure what the details and tacit premises of that inference are supposed to be, and suspect Kirkwood isn’t either. Regarding some openly LGBT judges in Cook County (“the adulterous judges of Cook County”), Kirkwood claimed that we “were better off when the Mafia ran Illinois because they were interested in making a profit, not making some kind of political statement that is totally abhorrent.” Of course, Kirkwood is officially very tired of the sexualization of America, even in the same paragraph where he states that Michael Sam’s “penchant for penis” is no cause for celebration. Hint: It’s not Michale Sam who is sexualizing this, John.

Diagnosis: It is hard to avoid concluding that Kirkwood is ... well, extremely interested in and focused on gay sex. In addition to being a hateful fundie bigot, of course.

Friday, May 19, 2017

#1838: Patricia King

Patricia King is the leader Extreme Prophetic, a group that advances doctrines considered fringe even among lunatic fundamentalists – even Cindy Jacobs and C. Peter Wagner reject them, though mostly for silly reasons, it seems. In particular, King and her group think they can raise the dead, and have devoted much effort to doing so: “Raising the dead has always been a mandate of the church. Jesus commissioned us to go in His name and preach the good news of the Kingdom. He then went on to explain, that includes healing the sick, casting out demons, and raising the dead.” Our old friend Caleb Brundidge is a prominent member, and Todd Bentley is allegedly a fan and student of King’s. It is worth noting that Cindy Jacobs claims to be able to raise the dead, too; her renounciation of what King claims to be doing seems to have more to do with fundie dislike of competition her perception of King as being involved in New Age worship of evil demons rather than a charge of charlatanery and/or delusion.

Apparently King runs an online Bible school and something she calls the Glory School, where students are offered the opportunity to “freely access the throne of grace, acquaint yourself with the glorious supernatural phenomenon in the Kingdom, encounter the Lord and His angelic majesties, and much more” (it’s not free). Here is a deranged critique by one Victor Hafichuk, who knows that King (“a New Age witch”) is a fraud because “God has graciously granted me and others access to the throne of grace to which she refers, and I’ve never seen her there.” Part of the criticism of King seems to be based on her New Ageish idea that “supernatural experiences” (i.e. hallucinations and tripping) should be a normal part of Christian life.

Diagnosis: Seriously delusional. She does indeed seem somewhat less explicitly evil than some of her critics – though that’s a low bar. Her impact is, despite her own claims to the contrary, probably relatively limited.

Wednesday, May 17, 2017

#1837: Ben Kinchlow

Benjamim “Ben” Kinchlow is best known for being the co-host of The 700 Club from 1975 to 1988 and again from 1992 to 1996, though he has also hosted other shows on the Christian Broadcasting Network, such as Straight Talk, which was not about straight talk. He is also the founder of Americans for Israel, and regularly writes columns for WND. Apparently he used to be a Black Nationalist before becoming a fundamentalist wingnut extremist.

Kinchlow the Constitutional scholar
Kinchlow is opposed to the separation of church and state (“The concept of separation of church and state used incessantly by anti-prayer, anti-Bible and anti-God forces to erode our constitutional liberties”), and since he is delusional, he has convinced himself that the separation of church is not suggested in the US Constitution (“[t]here is absolutely nothing in the U.S. Constitution or any other founding document that articulates, supports or defends the concept of the separation of church and state”). Instead, it is a communist idea; it is, as he has repeatedly pointed out, part of “the Soviet (not the U.S.) Constitution.” He also thinks the Establishment Clause violates the Free Exercise Clause, which is idiotic, and like most dominionists and dominionist sympathizers, he rejects (willfully ignores) the 14th Amendment. And no, he doesn’t have the faintest idea how the Constitution is supposed to work.

Kinchlow on politics
Naturally, Kinchlow was no fan of Obama, and as people like him are wont to do, he would quickly revert to delusions, lies and conspiracy theories in his criticisms. So, among Kinchlow’s complaints was that Obama “made Judges dependent on his Will alone, for the tenure of their offices, and the amount and payment of their salaries,” something Obama neither has done nor has the power to do, “has erected a multitude of New Offices,” which Obama neither has done nor has the power to do, imposed “Taxes on us without our Consent,” which he cannot do either (only Congress can – details to which Kinchlow’s mind is impressively immune), “subjugated the country to a jurisdiction foreign to our constitution, and unacknowledged by our laws,” something Kinchlow didn’t attempt to explain further.

According to Kinchlow, Obama is, if not a Muslim, at least “registered as a Muslim in Hawaii.” Apparently he read it “somewhere”. He doesn’t tell us when Hawaii started registering people by religious affiliation. But he does conclude that the White House is now “claimed for Islam”. He manages to derive that conclusion because he is a moron as well as a liar.

Here is Kinchlow’s brand of American exceptionalism. It’s … exceptional (“America is the first example in human history of a nation where people were given the right to vote, elect representatives and determine their own political fate [one wonders whether the crucial term here is “human”, and what that would imply];” “America has […] created a veritable paradise compared to most of the world;” “We have, on the whole, tended to be a moral and devout people. At home, we made a choice to end slavery [a few centuries after everyone else, but still], even at the cost of a bloody Civil War;” and, the best: “Abroad, again and again, we have chosen to side with less powerful nations when they have been attacked by aggressors. Americans have reached out at home and abroad with the hand of charity to people who are hurting.”)

Kinchlow’s solution to accusations of racism against the police is “No more white cops responding to distress calls in ‘da hood’;” if “no black cops are available, let the residents handle the situation, or wait until one is available.” As opposed to Kinchlow (“Bingo! All charges of racism will cease immediately”) we do not think the solution will make all charges of racism cease immediately.

Kinchlow and facts
Facts has never really mattered to Ben Kinchlow. So, for instance, when he claims that Iraq was involved in 9/11, he can neither back it up nor does he see the need to. He also has a tendency to attribute fake quotes to historical figures to bolster his agenda.

Kinchlow on evolution
Kinchlow is a creationist. According to Kinchlow, evolution is a religion of murder. The argument goes as follows: evolution is the religion of the godless (because of a dictionary that defines religion as “a set of beliefs concerning the cause, nature, and purpose of the universe;” yeah, that definition did in fact include some further conditions on what it takes to qualify as a religion, but Kinchlow disregarded those); religions come with moral codes; the moral code of evolution is murder. So there. And no, he doesn’t show any evidence of understanding the basics of the theory of evolution or the difference between a scientific theory and a moral code. Here is his description of the theory of evolution: “our theory (a proposed explanation whose status is still conjectural) is … we crawled out from the primordial ooze onto dry ground – and voila!” That … doesn’t much resemble the theory of evolution, but the “voila” part does resemble certain creation stories. “What is life? No one knows for sure, but it is assuredly much more than the result of a random bolt of lightning striking a pond of primordial stew,” continues Kinchlow. Ka-zing! He also helpfully emphasizes that “[k]eep in mind, according to the dictionary, a theory is a ‘proposed explanation whose status is still conjectural.’ It is a speculation, a guess, a conjecture,” which is not the definition of a theory [scientific] even according to the dictionary Kinchlow was using, thus demonstrating, once again, that he is dishonest in addition to stupid. No surprise there.

Ultimately, Kinchlow concludes, evolution is a religion that leads to eating babies.

Christianity, on the other hand, is not a religion, according to Kinchlow (forgetting his own definition for a moment): “One of the factors contributing to this precipitous deterioration of our society is the mistaken idea that the Bible is about religion and religious activities. Nothing could be further from the truth. This Judeo-Christian ‘Book,’ unlike some other ‘holy books,’ is not about establishing religion, but about creating order from disorder, control from chaos.”

Diagnosis: Good grief is Kinchlow dense and dishonest! People actually seem to listen to him, but it’s hard to determine what percentage of his audience tune in for the sheer entertainment value of such breathtaking inanity.